Responding to homeschool haters

I had a really hard time adjusting to the homeschool haters. I get it though, by choosing to homeschool many people think I am essentially rejecting their choice to send their children to public school. It is hard to see outside the box sometimes.

Dealing with homeschool haters! Changing your perspective when someone says something hurtful.

Among the things I have heard:

“Your children will never be socialized.” -Yes, we’ve all heard this one.
“What makes you think you’re smart enough to homeschool?”
“Is that even legal?”
“Your kids aren’t going to have any friends!”
“Your children are going to drive you nuts!”
“You’ll never have alone time.”
“Your kids are going to hate you.”

Of all the things I have heard, I have never once stopped and thought ‘wow this person has a point’, ‘I must immediately rethink my decision to homeschool’. No. I put a lot of thought into my decision. I know in my heart that it is the right choice for my family.

So instead of letting the comments get to me, make me mad, distressed or worse actually make me question myself, I ask myself why they have said such a thing. Nine times out of ten I can assume that this person isn’t familiar with homeschooling. When I put it into perspective I’m able to respond in a more appropriate manner.

When it comes to the socialization one I like to stick to a humorous response:

“What about socialization?” says the homeschool naysayer

“Oh my gosh I know!” I say “We have so many great field trip opportunities and such a great group of homeschool friends, it can be hard! I have to say no too a lot of great stuff that would be so fun, or educational. These outings have to wait until our lessons are done. I usually limit us to one field trip a week. It can be so disappointing, but yes, I do worry about socializing them too much.”

The one that gets to me most is the “Your kids are going to hate you” this one usually requires a little more digging. I ask why they think that. Is it because they will have no friends? Because we have lots of wonderful friends we met by homeschooling, myself included. Is it because they will be overworked by helicopter mom? Because most days we are done in 3-4 hours and they have more time to just be kids!

My point is this. When someone says something that is clearly offensive, do not get defensive right away. First figure out why they are saying what they are. Some people aren’t receptive to being educated on the topic of homeschooling, but many people are. Make it your mission to educate the ones who are receptive. You may end up turning a few people to homeschooling by changing your attitude.

And if you meet that person who just doesn’t want to hear it. I usually playing my favorite Taylor Swift song in my head. “Haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate… I’m just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake. Shake it off, Shake it off!” Shake it off ladies, no one is going to change their minds. Never mind the homeschool haters, because homeschool momma, you rock!

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